We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Randomize
