My nipple is on Facebook.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
I want her autograph on my taint
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
I think people are normalizing furries
Randomize
