I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
