I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
