Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
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