I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
Pants are for mortals
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
Randomize
