This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
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