hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
Randomize
