bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
Randomize
