yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
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