what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
My most recent midlife crisis involved eating a doughnut in 30 seconds but taking 5 minutes to do half a shot of whiskey, then deciding I wasn't going to finish it.
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
Randomize
