covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
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