It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
My puke in the shower morning just turned into a puke in the restroom at work afternoon. I'm the human embodiment of dumpster fire.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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