So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Randomize