wakey wakey hands off snakey
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
This is the prime rib incident all over again
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Randomize
