Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
It's official drugs can't kill me
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
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