if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
Randomize
