i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
Randomize
