No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize
