just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
I have aggressive nipples.
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Randomize
