you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
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