Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize
