It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
when I was too drunk to walk on my own two feet, he stole a shopping cart from the grocery store at the corner and proceeded to wheel me back to my apartment.
Then he tucked me in, gave me a goodnight kiss and slept on my sofa. I woke up this morning and he was making waffles.
he is a god among men.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
i out mim tonsoeep
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