my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize
