if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
do nipples grow back?
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