This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
never play flip cup with pint glasses
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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