Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
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