is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
You were trust falling into bushes
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
