Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
Randomize
