were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
I found the TV remote. It was in the washing machine along with the chicken wings you kept complaining to Domino's about that they 'never delivered'
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
You've changed since you got that strap on
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
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