Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
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