living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Randomize
