why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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