now i know why i became what i already was.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Randomize
