I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
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