I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
my poor anus
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
Randomize
