I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
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