If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
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