we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
Randomize
