the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
you had me at cake vodka
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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