There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize
