So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Randomize
