I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Randomize
