So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
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