In the future we'll all be gay
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
