I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I wish I only lived at night.
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
Randomize
