I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
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