oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
