Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
I woke up and there is a food processor in my purse. Someone else's framed family photo. My front door is wide open and my gerbil is playing in the water bong.
Yeah I'm going to bathe him.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
I have so many feelings about this burrito
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
Randomize