check it out our google latitudes are spooning
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
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